Visit the Shaks

I often joke about my 14 year old having a tapeworm, and I also joke that I need a tapeworm, but the reality is eww-nasty. The picture here is of a nearly 30 foot long tapeworm removed from a human. I am so grossed out by this it's not even funny.

However, it's intriguing, too. I must go to this parasite museum, so I can see it in person!

Have you ever wondered if you look like a celebrity? Now you can find out! MyHeritage.com has a cool face recognition tool that will tell you who you look like. I tried it out and am displaying my results below.  Try it out now and come back here to tell us which celebrity you resemble the most!

One of my Twitter friends asked this morning:

  If a kid is saying "dammit dammit dammit" just to get a reaction from you, should you give no reaction at all?

This is a good question. I think most of us parents face that at some point. The very first time you hear a tiny little kid swear, it's pretty funny. I know I've had a hard time not laughing when my kids swore...the first couple of times, anyway. After that it's just irritating and embarrassing.

So how do you get a kid not to swear? It's tough- they're usually doing it to get a reaction, but you don't feel right without saying anything at all.

Here's how I handle it- and it has worked pretty well for me. Whenever they say "bad" words, I tell them those are words for grownups only, and when they're grownups they can decide to use those words. As the kids get older, we talk about how PaPaw only uses those words every once in awhile and Grandmom never uses them.

Eventually, it sinks in!

[Photo Credit: O Pish Posh on Flickr]

Although April is almost over, I wanted to mention that it is National Child Abuse Prevention Month.

Childwelfare.gov has a resource packet on preventing child abuse and neglect. The resource packet "Includes information on supporting families, protective factors, public awareness, community activities, positive parenting, prevention programs, and more". (This information is free to use in reference to National Child Abuse Prevention Month or the availability of the packet.) You will find an outline below of the information contained within the packet:

Overview
Understanding child abuse prevention and what to do when children are at risk. Includes frequently asked questions and links to related Federal and national organizations and State contacts that work to prevent child abuse.

Promoting healthy families
Information on how to enhance protective factors in families and ways to support and partner with parents. Includes a calendar of family activities and parenting resources.

Public awareness & creating supportive communities
Tools for sharing a child abuse prevention message with your community and building community support.

Prevention programs
Standards for prevention programs, research on what works, information on the role of related professionals, and resources for specific types of programs.

Developing & sustaining prevention programs
Developing a prevention program, conducting a community needs assessment, finding and sustaining adequate funds, and collaborating with community partners.

Evaluating prevention programs
Evaluating program effectiveness and performing cost analysis. Features the Evaluation Toolkit and Logic Model Builder.

If you find yourself feeling negative, try using affirmations. This can help change your thoughts to a more positive  direction.

Your thoughts are going to dictate the choices you make. If you are stuck in a negative thinking pattern, the choices you make will be based upon that negative thinking. However, it thinking positively, your choices will reflect that positivity and help get you closer to your goals.

Here is a great read for motivation. Personal Development For The Book Smart has a list of 101 Affirmations You Can Start Using Today!.

Of course, there's lots of people who are having kids that really shouldn't be, but there's something about this sign that simultaneously cracks me up and makes me sick deep in the pit of my stomach.

I think it's the mom pitching the baby in the dumpster like it's diving into a pool that cracks me up so much. The making me sick to my stomach part is pretty obvious. Nurses can be men, too! ;)

Until they all come home, let's support our troops. How? Trish of Email Our Military, guest posting at the Qpit blog tells us how:

Prior to September 11, 2001 it was possible for civilians to send letters, notes, and homemade cards to military service members through a program called Any Service Member mail. With the threat of terrorism following 9/11, the Department of Defense cancelled the Any Service Member mail program for the safety of our military. As a result, eMail Our Military was created to help fill the void.

My friends at Qipit joined us in our efforts this year and have been very helpful in working with us to personalize email to and from our troops. Qipit is now making it really easy for personal communications, like cards, letters and even legal documents, to be converted into an email format.

Just as Conrad has written here many times, Qipit is a free online copy, scanning and fax service that doesn’t require a scanner, just a digital camera or camera phone. I’m finding that it is the next best thing to the original document, much easier than going to a copy store and it saves you the expense.

Here at eMail Our Military, we were already getting our messages of love and support to the frontlines electronically, now we can again send the actual images, from their creators to our troops.

As you can imagine, it is so much more meaningful to see the words of from a child or spouse in their own handwriting, and with illustrations.

If you’re reading this and you don’t know anyone in the military, you can still get involved. Our service members need you. Please contact us and we’ll show you how. Everyone is invited to join eMOM. Our military needs all of our support.

Get involved. This is important.

I have three adorable little boys and I love them dearly. When they are not so little anymore, I know I am going to miss these times. While I do not want them to grow up too fast, there are some things I am looking forward to once they are a little older.

Here is my list of things I am looking forward to when the kids get older. You will see they are really quite simple but will seem like luxuries when the time comes:

1. Being able to walk around my house freely. No more baby gates. No more thinking of the placement of little toddlers while I go upstairs to grab the laundry basket or run down to the basement for something. I will be able to just go up or go down and not even think about it!

2. Reading books. I was a very avid reader when I was young and that basically stopped once I had children. I am sure I could manage a book here or there but by the time the kids go to bed, I am tired and not in the mood to read. Once they are a lot more independent, I can't wait to dive right back in to some great books!

3. Sleeping later. I know I will never go back to sleeping until 10 or 11 like I did when I was a teen (nor would I want to), but I sure am looking forward to sleeping a little later on the weekends. Maybe 8:00??

4. Doing housework without a little boy trying to unfold what I just folded. Washing a floor without having to wait until my "baby" is taking a nap so he won't think it is a game and slip on it. Doing basic chores without one of them making it harder than it needs to be.

5. No more car seats! Get in, buckle up, get out. Simple as that.

6. Privacy in the bathroom!

I am sure there are a few more things but I don't want to appear too whiny. None of these things are a big deal. However, one thing that I really have learned after becoming a mother is that I took so much for granted before I had children. I will appreciate little things like this when the time comes. So, what is on your list?

Ah, FrugalDad is a man after my own heart:

I don’t like the word “allowance.” It looks too much like receiving money whether you work for it or not. I personally do not believe this helps to prepare kids for the real world where they are expected to get out there and earn a living. So around the frugal family household you actually have to work to get paid (novel approach, isn’t it?). The various daily chores are age-appropriate and do not require a great deal of time to complete. We also include some larger chores for the kids to pick from in order to earn a little extra money. These larger chores are optional, but provide our kids the opportunity to stretch to earn more money.

Go over there to read more about how he does it. It's a fabulous idea!

There is one thing that always makes it a little easier for me to get out of bed in the morning. It is the thought of some nice and warm coffee waiting for me in the kitchen. I make it the night before and have it programmed to brew in time for my husband to grab a cup before he leaves for work.

Yesterday, I got up and discovered that my coffee pot was shot. No coffee for us. Hubby tinkered with it when he got home but it was beyond hope so it went in the trash. I was not thrilled with facing another morning without any coffee.

This morning was a slow start! No coffee, no motivation and a slight headache started. By 10:00, I packed up the kids and headed to my little country store around the corner. I got my coffee fix and I feel sooooo much better!

I only drink coffee in the morning. You will not find me at Starbucks or any other coffee house. However, it is apparent that I am addicted to my two cups of coffee here at home. Without it, I am dysfunctional and rather crabby. I drink Folgers coffee and their little jingle is so true "The best part of waking up is Folgers in your cup"! Do you need coffee to get you going too?

Summer at Mom Is Teaching has the most awesome serious-ish, tongue-in-cheek-ish post ever about home schooling titled "How To Hate On Homeschoolers Properly":

First and foremost  stereotypes are your friend. Love them, care for them, and stick by them unconditionally. If the current stereotype is that all home educating families are from Mars and wear green polka dot jumpsuits then you better make sure you make that point in your rant. Often. A quick glimpse online will let you know how you should wrap all home educating families. Currently we’re all anti-diversity, anti-science, bible beaters. Remember, the common stereotypes change often depending on who has a headline to sell so check often.

Go here to read the rest. It's really enlightening.

I absolutely love this song by Trace Adkins called "You're Gonna Miss This". I keep trying to tell my oldest son this same message. To tell you the truth, on difficult mommy days, I have to remind myself of this sometimes. This song really hits home. If you have not heard it, listen to it and see if you don't feel it too.

Speaking of Twitter, my Twitter pal Thunderror tagged me to do a post yesterday and I'm just now getting around to it today. Yes, folks, that's how I roll.

Now, his post is a lovely "ABCs of me" post, but because I'm writing this here at my parenting blog, I think "ABCs of being mom" suits here, eh?

Here we go, kids:

A is for Animals which could be beloved pets, or it could be how the kids act sometimes.

B is for Birthdays. Some parents throw big expensive parties, some of us just take the kid to the beach. But we all try to make it special, cause we're (usually, ha) glad we had those kids.

C is for the Candy we all said we would never let our kids have, but most of us have anyway.

D is for Days which go by so slowly for kids but so quickly for us!

E is for the Earth, which I'm trying to teach my kids to respect and preserve.

F is for Four letter words, which I taught my kids because I want them to become artists with curse words. ;)

G is for Garage, which is where I escape to when the kids become too much to deal with.

H is for Home- sometimes it's messy and sometimes it's clean, but it's always comfortable.

I is for Ice Cream, which I think I'm going to take the kids to get tonight, since it's warm enough and Casey just made me think I absolutely need some ice cream.

J is for Joy, which I felt when the kids were born and continue to feel as I watch them grow.

K is for Kitty, which was one of my daughter's first words- except she couldn't say the "K" sound, so she went around saying "Titty" all the time, which still cracks me up to this day.

L is for Love, of course, which all kids need to grow.

M is for Marriage, which kids can both wreak havoc on or really enrich. Sometimes both.

N is for North Carolina where my kids would go for every vacation we took.

O is for Oysters, which I always manage to miss the season of. "When is oyster season?" I asked the server at the restaurant we were at. "Months that have an "R" in them," she said, "Other than April and September." That cleared it right up.

P is for Puppy, which everyone seems to think is perfect for a kid, but I think a rescued adult puppy is the very best kind of dog for a kid.

Q is for Queen, which my daughter insists is her spot in the family, but I remind her that she is only a Princess, for now. Someday she'll be the Queen and I'll be the Queen Mum, but not now. She has a little more time to grow before she gets to be the Queen of her life.

R is for Rotten, which describes my daughter's current mood and my youngest son's current behavior. It makes for some fun times.

S is for Sleep, which you can count on never having much of again, until your kids are grown.

T is for Tomatoes, which my youngest son and I like to pick fresh and warm from the sun out of our garden and sprinkle with a little bit of salt and eat them like they're candy.

U is for Uvula, because I can say that and my kids will giggle everytime. It is kind of a funny word.

V is for Very, as in my daughter's "very good" behavior while she tries to wrest my computer from me.

W is for Water, which my kids love and want to be in constantly.

X is for Xanax. When I worked at an office, we always joked about installing a Xanax dispenser. Some days we could use one around here, too.

Y is for Yesterday- every day passes right before us, and it all becomes yesterday eventually.

Z is for the Zoo, a place I hate and my kids love. Still, it's better than Chuck. E. Cheese.

If you are interested in learning more about Earth Day and finding some fun crafts, activities and interesting information, check out the Earth Day page on Kaboose.com. In the meantime, here is a brief Earth Day video that tells us a little bit about the history of Earth Day.

This is actually an old picture from a different trip to the beach, but it will have to do since I didn't take any pictures this time. 3 days, over 1500 miles and 3 states. The CREATE South conference went very well and then my 14 year old son Flip and I went to Wilmington to celebrate his birthday. It was a blast. We pigged out on seafood and spent way too much time on the beach.

Finally, we left for home and just outside of Raleigh, the cloudy sky turned pitch black suddenly. Then the temperature dropped and I was seeing thunder and lightning everywhere. I searched through the radio stations for a weather report, but found none. About half the cars on the road were pulling over and about half were driving on. I wasn't sure what to do- we had left about 3 and a half hours later than I had planned and pulling over would really throw our time off. But if it was tornadic, I had no choice but to stop and take cover.

What to do? I asked Twitter. I had Flip post a message from my phone asking any of my Twitter friends to call me and left my phone number. I was apprehensive to do this because my Twitter updates are not protected and any fool could have called me.

Fortunately, my Twitter pal John Carney was my knight in shining armor. He helped me figure out where I was and he got the weather report for me and found that there was no tornadic activity in the area. I continued on down the road and made it safely home. Heather and CarolinaDreamz also gave me a call and I had nice conversations with them as well!

Twitter's not just a fun toy, I've found. It's helpful in many different ways. Are you Twittering? Follow me right here. And I've deleted that tweet with my phone number, so no, you won't be able to stalk me. ;) I follow just about everyone that follows me other than obvious spammers. I've had to block a couple of people who were made of crazy and lose (the exact opposite of awesome and win), but altogether I find Twitter users to be fabulous people!

A chemical called Bisphenol-A (BPA) is used in clear plastic bottles as well as some other food containers. Reports are saying that exposure to BPA can cause developmental problems or lead to cancer, diabetes or attention deficit disorder.

Many popular baby bottles contain BPA and the chemical leaches out when the bottle is heated or through repeated dishwasher use. I just heard this the other day and decided to look into it. The problem is, the more I look, the less clear the answer becomes!

There are sites that talk about replacing all of your baby bottles and sippy cups with non-BPA alternatives. There are organizations in Canada and the U.S. that are trying to get BPA banned. Then there are sites saying that the bad press about BPA is completely unnecessary and alarming the public for no reason.

Do you ever feel like you are being lied to so often by either corporate America or the press that you no longer know what to believe? There is the controversy about the safety of vaccines, lead levels in toys and now a chemical used to feed our babies. I feel at a total loss as who or what to believe anymore.

This reminds me of Ivy's post "We Do The Best We Can" where she talks about people looking down on parents who don't feed their children completely organic food. If we try to eat healthy and chemical free, it is extremely expensive. The sippy cups I looked at that do not contain BPA are as high as $17 a cup! What is the public to do if the chemicals they use in our everyday products are harmful, but the alternatives are too expensive for typical budgets?

This whole subject just makes me very sad. Manufacturers do not seem to care about our safety. The FDA does not seem to do a very good job in my opinion. The rising numbers in autism, ADHD and other childhood conditions is alarming. Something is hurting our children and I bet it comes from many sources that were put on the shelves with the might dollar in mind rather than safety. What are your thoughts on this latest threat?

Through Blog Catalog, I have met a blogger named Shirley. She is a very ambitious blogger with high ideals and goals to help children. Her blog is titled Proof Positivity and she sees it as "an opportunity for children of all ages to find their voice through positive news".

Shirley's vision: "For every child to have an opportunity to write or report no matter what their grades are."

She explains why: "A child sometimes needs to develop a love for something before they are motivated enough to bring their grades up."

Shirley's goal: "My goal is to put a studio in every school and for that, equipment is needed. I hope to eventually be able to go to my schools and discuss: Who? What? Where? When? Why? and How?"

Kudos to Shirley for her love of children and her strong desire to help them. Take a minute and check out Proof Positivity for yourself.

With money being tight, free shipping can be a real cost saver. Even if money's not tight, why pay for shipping? Thanks to FreeShipping.org, you can save on the shipping cost of most of the things you buy online.

The site is really well designed and is very easy to navigate. For example, if you're just looking for a Macy's free shipping code, you can navigate right to that part by clicking the Macy's logo. Same with Target free shipping, Best Buy free shipping, and a ton of other major retailers.

I order online a lot to avoid paying high gas prices, so I know how important it is to save on shipping costs. Now that I know about FreeShipping.org, that'll be my place to get my free shipping codes.

The best part is, Love Shak, Baby and FreeShipping.org have teamed up to offer TWO lucky readers the chance to win a $50 Macy's E-Card. And when you win your $50 E-Card, you can use FreeShipping.org to get Macy's free shipping on your order! They have over 15 free shipping codes just for Macy's. It's a win-win for everyone! :)

Here's how to enter:

Simply go over to the FreeShipping.org website then come back and leave a comment on this post to tell us which is your favorite retailer on their site. Or, if your favorite retailer isn't listed, let us know what it is! The contest starts today, April 17th and runs for 3 weeks until Midnight CST on May 9th.

So, hurry up and leave a comment today to have a chance to win one of 2 Macy's E-Gift Cards! Only one entry per email address, please. We will randomly select the lucky winners and will announce them on May 10th!

Good luck!

(This is a "sticky" post and will remain at the top of the page for the duration of our Spring Fling Giveaway but new posts will be written daily and published underneath this post.)

Tomorrow, I'm going to get my oldest son out of school at 11:30 and we're going to hop on the road for a road trip for his 14th birthday.

Oh, and there's that little conference I'm speaking at, too, (if you're in the Myrtle Beach area this weekend, come on out- it's free!) but he doesn't care about that. To him, this is his 14th birthday road trip. He doesn't care that we're doing this on a dime, he doesn't care that we won't be eating in fancy restaurants, he's just happy to get to go on a road trip with his mom for his birthday.

I feel so lucky to have a kid who is that cool. When I was 14, I hated my mom and would have rather died than go on a road trip with her. I just hope my other kids turn out to be so awesome.

My middle son has been on very good behavior lately (for the most part). He has been in a mood to please me and act like a "big boy". I was thinking about taking him to the toy store to buy him a little something that he mentioned he wanted.

After reading a dad's story from Random Ramblings about an "Unforgettable trip to the toy store", ummmmm, I think I changed my mind! It is a classic tale of what can make the combination of kids and a toy store a nightmare for the parent!

First, they lead-painted my Dora toys, now the fake hillbilly teeth? What's next, my cell phone? Don't answer that, please. I guess now if I want some hillbilly teeth, I'll have to grow my own. Sigh.

HT: Truemors

The sun is shining and the birds are singing. What a beautiful morning to enjoy a cup of coffee and think about the the wonderful day to come. This calm and peaceful feeling lasted all of about ten minutes. Then my little boys started waking up!

Sometimes I wonder if they have a little pow-wow meeting the night before and all agree to wake up in a bad mood the next day. First up was my middle son way earlier than usual. He proceeded to say "Mommmmm" in a whining voice at least twenty times since his awakening. Next up was my oldest boy who is notoriously grumpy in the morning. He didn't let me down and played his grumpy morning bit to the hilt. Last up was Baby D who let out a ferocious howl to let me know that my last sunshine boy was awake.

There are rare mornings where my little angels get up smiling with the son. Today was not one of those precious mornings. However, the birds are still singing and my coffee is still warm. Maybe Mr. Sun and I can talk these little guys into a smile before the morning is over.

Awhile back, my friend Kat Coble wrote a post with a title that has been rolling around in my head for months: The Assumption Of Relative Wealth. It's a good post that focuses on how many people on the internet just assume that people have a certain amount of money and if you don't- you're doing something wrong.

I see a lot of this sort of assumption on mommy blogs and parenting forums all over the internet. I read a lot of frugality blogs where people get all hyper about what everyone else is eating. I once saw- somewhere- someone say if you can't afford to feed your kids organic food, you are abusing your children.

Ummm...yeah. Count me guilty of child abuse in that case, then. I do what I can, but especially with the price of food lately, all or even mostly organic food is but a dream.

Of course, the person who said that either wasn't thinking of the millions of children all over the world who have to dumpster dive- and not in good American dumpsters, either- for their food, or that person is just a clueless jerk. Is dying and leaving your child an orphan in a third world country child abuse? I just don't know.

Here's what I do know. I'm getting really sick and tired of stay at home moms who assume everyone should have a certain amount of time and money to serve their children made-from-scratch all-organic food extravaganzas. We don't all have that luxury, and most of us are doing the best we can. Consider the single mom who comes home from an 8 or 10 hour shift on her feet at a low paid job and just wants to microwave some chicken nuggets for the kids. Child abuse? Bad parenting?

I think when you don't have to struggle for your existence, it's easy to become very holier than thou. And that attitude filters down to your children. It's easy to become cynical in this world. What are you teaching your kids? Compassion and kindness? Or are you teaching them the assumption of relative wealth?

Photo Credit: Compassion Blog- consider sponsoring a child!

Do you or your teenager have an account on Facebook? If you do, you might be aware of the tracking and displaying of personal information that occurs with Facebook Beacon.

Facebook Beacon creates cookies that collect information and in turn, informs that user's friends about his or her purchases. This is done by tracking information of Facebook Beacon users on third-party partner sites. Shortly after the release of Facebook Beacon, quite an uproar occurred once people realized the serious violations of privacy this system imposes.

For example, you buy a book entitled "How To Save Your Marriage". If that book was purchased through a Facebook Beacon partner site, then all of your Facebook friends will know you purchased that book which could lead to an uncomfortable situation. What if your teenager has a Facebook account? You might purchase acne medicine for your teen and through cookie tracking, the acne purchase could be broadcast to all of your teen's Facebook friends.

Computerworld.com explains it further "New plug-in gives Facebook users another way to dodge Beacon":

"The groundswell of criticism began when a security researcher said that the ad system tracks user activities on third-party partner sites -- including the activities of people who never signed up with Facebook, who deactivated their accounts or who were not signed on to the site."

A new Facebook plug-in has been developed that will allow users to monitor and delete cookies created by the Facebook Beacon advertising system. The toolbar provides an updated list of Beacon retailers which allows you to decide which sites you would like to block. This free plug-in was developed by Flugpo (a social classifieds network) who has always been an advocate on Internet safety and privacy.

The free plug-in can be found at MyDataIsMyData.org along with detailed information.

This was my very favorite song when I was six!